A Ramble on Quality of Life

Quality of Life is a recurring theme in my appointments with cancer doctors. Some people’s bodies and minds adjust quite well. Some don’t. I’m in the latter category. They remind me of the myriad of preexisting conditions and traumas my body had experienced before cancer and the trauma of treatment. Apparently my body is tired and a bit worn out.

I woke up in the middle of the night in pain and overcome by nausea and that sinking feeling knowing I wouldn’t fall asleep again and the exhaustion of trying to accept the realities of my new post cancer life.

Sometimes I think it would be better if there was no before for comparison. Sometimes I wonder if surviving cancer is the right thing, the kind thing. I am trying to find something I can do with these last years and my lack of mobility. I think I would like to be a student again. I loved college. I was good at being a student. So maybe my hobby will be learning.

Sorry. Rambling thoughts. I didn’t sleep. My head hurts. That phantom place where the incision was made hurts. Damaged nerves. Damaged lives.

Blessings.

by Josephine Robin Dalton
Not particularly a relevant photo other than it being a revered place of learning. Radcliffe Camera, Oxford ~ October 2010

 

Reading Poetry

New poetry I’m reading. I had to look up Erato. I had forgotten. She was one of the Greek Goddesses, the muse of erotic poetry and mime.

I was reading a novel but it failed to hold my attention. So now I’m sliding down the rabbit hole into poetry.

C6C5AF59-5EC8-4752-923D-657B149BB348

We Watched the Moon

Last night
we watched
the moon

It was golden
and slowly
disappearing
into the darkness
of a summer night
until it stopped
hanging there
like a sacred vessel
waiting to be filled

I’m just
a microscopic
particle
a molecular
miracle

Still

for a moment
I think
I believe

I filled the moon
up with my breath

and a sigh

and a shared smile
before we returned
to our lives once again

with wisps of the sacred
trailing behind us

18 July 2019

Drugs and British politicians: a bonus post — Notes from the U.K.

As I write this, half the Conservative Party is in the running to be the next party leader and, in a kind of two-for-one offer that’s built into British politics, since the Conservatives are the ruling party, the next prime minister. For at least a brief time, since the Conservatives have a fragile hold on […]

via Drugs and British politicians: a bonus post — Notes from the U.K.

 

If you’re not following this blog, you should be. This is an especially amusing and relevant post. ~ Rxx