It Snowed Today

It snowed today

I danced
with dogs

Until the afternoon
claimed me

The nice man
with his litany
of risks
and risk assessments
and no way to know
if I will survive
the cellular event
or the not quite cure

It’s a numbers game
breast cancer

I have part of a breast
a missing nipple
and a tiny
little thread
of hope

It snowed today

I let myself
fall
into the purity
of white

and forgot
about
the heaviness
of not knowing

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Finding yourself between the pages of a book…

“The shadow past is shaped by everything that never happened.” ~ Anne Michaels

My therapist gives me assignments. Sometimes poems to write and sometimes books to read.

We talk a lot about my cancer diagnosis these days. There aren’t many people that can bear talking about it. My thoughts and feelings have reached a crashing crescendo of intensity. Yesterday she said when you are faced with your mortality in the way I am, the sense of time just falls away. You are left exposed and raw. So I don’t talk much. I think and feel… quietly.

Yesterday I was told to read this book. “I think you will find yourself in its pages,” she said. It’s another kind of grace, I think.

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Why Creative People Sometimes Make No Sense – Matthew Schuler

100 Days of Sunshine

photo cover
Photo by Sophia Alexis

Are you a Creative type? Do you ever feel misunderstood? If you said yes to both, then have a look at this article: Why Creative People Sometimes Make No Sense

If this sounds familiar to you, then you are very well aware of how hard it is to explain to someone all your complexities, all the parts of you that make you, you. It’s impossible. Creative types get it, other don’t. So I have a solution for, print this out & hand it out to every new person you meet. You can begin with this: Hi, I am ______ & I come with a manual.

I wish you best of luck my creative friend!

You should also keep in mind that not everyone will get you or like you, and that’s ok. Those who stick around, will get to see the real beauty inside you. Those…

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Dixie, the Wonderdog, turned 13 yesterday!

Starting my second week of trying to survive the Aussie Flu and I managed to infect the Wonderspouse. Happy Wednesday, all!

Love and Hearts and Stuff

“Love doesn’t just sit there, like a stone. It has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new.” ~ Ursula K. Le Guin

I’m sick with a painful chesty cough and a fever. It’s not fair to have breast cancer and flu.

However, today I received the letter telling me when my appointment with the oncologist is. Approximately two weeks from now. And then I’ll probably start chemo two weeks after that. But I must get well.

Valentine’s Day is a weird holiday. We rarely celebrate it. Everyday is Valentine’s Day for us. And our anniversary is just a couple of weeks away. However, the Wonderspouse brought home red roses last night. And he’s cooking a special Valentine’s Day dinner. I’m blessed.

Wishing all of you love.

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From Susan Branch. I needed these reminders.