Forgotten

My body
has turned
tyrant

I have
forgotten

how to listen
how to see

The dawn chorus
used to slip between
the cracks
of my resistance
until hope
became
a beating heart

Now
the silence
is impenetrable

While my body
rants and raves
at the unfairness
at the insistence
that each tiny
movement
each birth
of an idea
must be
accompanied
by pain
by impossibilities

It is 3 am
I am trying
to teach myself
how to listen again
even as my hip
begins to spasm

The birds
will come soon
I’m trying to be ready

23 December 2019
Sussex Coast

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Sunset on the South Downs ~ Photography by me

We Watched the Moon

Last night
we watched
the moon

It was golden
and slowly
disappearing
into the darkness
of a summer night
until it stopped
hanging there
like a sacred vessel
waiting to be filled

I’m just
a microscopic
particle
a molecular
miracle

Still

for a moment
I think
I believe

I filled the moon
up with my breath

and a sigh

and a shared smile
before we returned
to our lives once again

with wisps of the sacred
trailing behind us

18 July 2019

New

There will come a time

Yes
even for you

when life
will ask of you
the impossible

I have no
magic

Sometimes
I pretend I do
but I don’t

Its a kind of
gossamer world
that makes my eyes
sparkle
keeps my dreams
alive

The only thing
I think I know

Is that nothing
stays the same,
lasts forever

There is no
magic elixir

no obscure
incantation

no absolute
and forever
healing

There is only
beginning again

20 May 2019
West Sussex

2012-05-04 15.26.32

Hello

I used to wish
for closure
for proper
goodbyes

With time
and loss
comes
a kind of
knowing
like
blood flowing

like pollen
dancing
in sunlight

Now I know
I just needed
more Hellos.

17 May 2019
West Sussex

IMG_4203

Blue Like the Sea

My blanket is blue
blue, like the sea

If I look
in the right way
in the right light
I can see it
moving
against me
like waves

and if I close my eyes
I can lose myself
in mermaid dreams
and swimming
against the tide
until I soften
and let go

and I am in
California
again
laughing
and falling
and tumbling
into the arms
of the sea

and I wonder
when I forgot
what my laugh
sounds like

until I reach
for my blanket
blue like the sea
and fall
into dreaming
of swimming
and breathing

15 May 2016
West Sussex

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