I used to wish
for closure
for proper
goodbyes
With time
and loss
comes
a kind of
knowing
like
blood flowing
like pollen
dancing
in sunlight
Now I know
I just needed
more Hellos.
17 May 2019
West Sussex
Blue Like the Sea
My blanket is blue
blue, like the sea
If I look
in the right way
in the right light
I can see it
moving
against me
like waves
and if I close my eyes
I can lose myself
in mermaid dreams
and swimming
against the tide
until I soften
and let go
and I am in
California
again
laughing
and falling
and tumbling
into the arms
of the sea
and I wonder
when I forgot
what my laugh
sounds like
until I reach
for my blanket
blue like the sea
and fall
into dreaming
of swimming
and breathing
15 May 2016
West Sussex
The End
It was a game of bingo
or was it craps
or was it his voice
whispering
my name, softened
and rhythmic
and flowing
arcing
reaching
for a pause
searching
waiting
for the end
14 May 2019
West Sussex
The Sound Words Make
She had a fancy new journal spread out on her desk and a not so fancy fountain pen in her hand. She wrote a sentence or two, nothing special, just to hear the sound of the pen against the paper.
She wasn’t thinking about her words. She was letting her troubled mind be soothed by sound.
Sometimes you think about what’s important and your brain floods you with answers, with hierarchies of answers.
But your heart? Well sometimes your heart just needs to be soothed by the sounds of the small things, like a pen leaving scratches on virgin paper.
Hard Ground, Manic and Endless
I am thinking
about you
looking out my window
watching spring
wishing I hadn’t forgotten
how to laugh
watching you
even now
can still
make me smile
and stumble
reaching
for empty air
that rush
of soft voices
home
Thinking about you
I give up
sit down
on hard ground
let my teeth
slide into soft peach
trying to remember
the sound of you
manic and endless
5 April 2019
